Entries Tagged 'In The News' ↓

Unless you have been living under a rock recently, you know that law enforcement has been bitch-smacked by the liberal socialist press recently for two incidents, which I like to refer to as “Don’t Tase Me, Bro” and “Wow, I’ve Been Living In A Techno-Cave”. Since we all know about the dickhead who, essentially, wanted to make a name for himself on YouTube and thus started disrupting John Kerry at a speech with questions and then resisted arrest, I won’t discuss any more on that subject.

Here’s what I will talk about: ideology verses common sense in the case of one Star Simpson.

Ideologically, innocence is always innocent — if you only mean one thing and someone takes it the wrong way, that’s someone’s problem, not yours. But, in practice, this simply isn’t the case. Much like in law, ignorance of the law does not excuse breaking the law, ignorance of social mores or cause and effect is not an excuse. For example, if I walked into Germany wearing a swastika because I was trying to say my body is my Hindu temple (or something equally unknown in the mainstream) I would have absolutely no right to look shocked that I was arrested — it is illegal to wear or display the Swastika in that country.

I do not agree with Germany on that policy, but I would not be angry with the police who arrested me when it was *I* who needed to know what the Swastika is interpreted as and how the law is designed around it.

Since the day that two buildings in New York City fell down, terrorism has been a real and imagined concern in the eyes of the populace, but even before that (I say this as a former airport employee, by the way) before TSA and all the Orwellian nightmares they induce, before planes were turned into Weapons of Mass Murder and Destruction, you could not walk into an airport and through security with something strapped on your chest that had exposed wires and an exposed electrical supply and anything resembling plastic explosive on your hands. Would you have been shot — or at least stared down the business end of a gun? Maybe, maybe not. Most people weren’t that stupid. Most people knew the rules, even before water became a threatening substance: no guns, no (large) knives/weapons, and nothing that looks like a bomb.

Remember Pan-Am 103?

So why, in the name of all common sense, would anyone think that an electrically-wired shirt with an exposed battery and wires would make it through security? More over, why would anyone defend this?

Oh, that’s right — because TSA are always wrong. Always.

Now, I’ll tell you something, as someone who was in the airport when there were private security firms, who knows people who lost jobs to the TSA overhaul, who couldn’t go to work for three days because suddenly my security clearance wasn’t up to the newly-imposed standards, who had to deal with John Wayne cowboys who wouldn’t let me take my lunch through security more often than not, even though this was years before the liquids ban, and MPs (Military Police) who sexually harassed me every day I went to work, I hate the TSA more than anyone. Yet, I’m not going to fault them for doing their job. I’d think someone who was walking around with exposed wires and batteries and putty on their hands was up to no good too.

And, ladies and gentlemen, look at what airport this took place at: LOGAN. This was the airport from which two of the buildings fall down day airplanes left from, who took most of the flack for the terrorist attacks of the day. This is an airport in BOSTON, a city which arrested two men who were just putting up some guerrilla marketing and only cared about hairdos of the 1970s, for putting up hoax devices.

None of these things make what they did right, but neither is banning a symbol. Yet that’s the reality you have to live with until we can get enough people petitioning enough politicians to change the law. And, by the way, martyrdom may raise awareness, but it’s a piss poor way to do it, especially when it involves gratuitous acts of stupidity.

You’d have to be an idiot to wear that shirt into Logan Airport and not expect something to happen. Hell, if this was London, she’d have been shot seven times in the head and once in the shoulder.

You’d have to be an idiot, or much like “Don’t Tase Me, Bro”, a fame hound.

You be the judge.

I don’t know which is worse, that the man who first brought us John McClane has been sentenced to four months in prison today or that Jack Bauer’s been charged with drunk driving.

See, kids, this is how the terrorists win — when our heroes (or people who direct our heroic epics) make asses of themselves! Next, Arnold Vosloo will save some kittens, Jeremy Irons and his brother, Alan Rickman, will publically donate money to starving orphans, and Art Malik will join up with Habitat for Humanity.

WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?!

Apparently someone called Sherri Shepherd is one of an ever-changing roster of hosts for morning TV show ‘The View’. And recently, when Whoopi Goldberg asked her on-air if she though the world is flat, she replied that she did not know.

Quite why anyone is surprised that she’s an idiot is beyond me. She co-hosts The View, ferchrissakes, and with Whoopi and Barbara on board, she’s relegated to fulfilling one of the chairs reserved for ‘hosts who will say dumb things the big-name hosts can pick on them for.’
She also apparently retracted her statements today, claiming she was too nervous and confused to answer the question properly. Which also makes sense. I mean, she’s only the most frequent guest on Ellen’s talk show, and veteran of two or three sitcoms and several movies into the bargain. People with that much experience frequently get too nervous to answer very simple yes-or-no questions that fourth-graders would call you retarded for asking, I’m sure.

Of course, stupid though she might seem, she is a little more intelligent than people have given her credit for: she knew this was going to happen.
“Now just keep praying, that every morning I don’t put my foot in my mouth – but if you know me, it’s bound to happen.”

And she can look on the bright side: it’s not the stupidest view that has ever been expressed on The View – not since Rosie O’Donnell hosted last year, anyway.

Some guy in Ohio was arrested a couple of days ago, largely because he was the kind of person who calls 911 when he doesn’t want to show his receipt and is then stupid enough to throw a hissy fit about showing ID. To a cop. That he called. Even though it wasn’t an emergency.

This is a great illustration of what happens when people try to be activists based on something they’ve read threads about on online discussion forums. Exhibit: after buying merchandise from Circuit City, customer refuses to show his receipt to the loss prevention guy posted on the door. Because he’s read leftist blogs about freedom, man, and he wants to show THE MAN that he can’t tell Joe Prole what to do. Ignoring the fact that he’s paid for the stuff, and it takes all of four seconds for someone to glance at a receipt and at said stuff in his bag. Ignoring the fact that, goddamnit, the loss prevention guy is hired specifically to CHECK RECEIPTS, and that if a bunch of shoplifters waltz out with stolen goods in store-branded bags, the loss prevention guy is the one who takes the hit for that. Namely by being fired.
Okay, yeah. I get it. You PAID for your goods, so why should you have to prove it? Well, because shoplifters also have the ability to say that they paid for their shit and walk out, with completely straight faces. This isn’t a case of OH MY GOD THE MAN WANTS TO SEE MY RECEIPT HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF BEING A SHOPLIFTER — it’s a case of, dude, seriously, you should just suck it up and show your receipt out of common courtesy of making it easier for a business to do business.

By the way, I claim utter bias in this: not just because I work for the company in question — I’d call this guy a fucktard if he pulled the same shit on Best Buy, CompUSA, the Apple Store, or Ann fucking Summers — but because twice a week I have to count different categories of items in-store to check if the number we have is the same as the system thinks we should have. And software – one of the things the fucktard in question bought – is a horrible category for this. People steal games all the goddamned time. The very least invasive thing a store can do is ask to see your receipt when you’re leaving. They’re not asking for ID. They’re not running a credit check. They’re not taking your picture for future reference, or your phone number, or any kind of personal details. If you put up a fight about it for no better reason than you don’t want to, that puts you on the same level as the people who bitch and moan about being forced to wear seatbelts by the government.
YOU GAIN NOTHING BY ARGUING THIS, SAVE INCONVENIENCING OTHERS. You’re the kind of jackass who edits random shit out of Wikipedia articles because you think it’s non-notable. You’re the kind of person who finds a loophole in a BB system’s rules to say inflammatory shit and then cries and moans about being thrown out.
You’re a real-life troll, making it difficult for other people just so you can feel smarter and more important.

Here’s a suggestion: if you’re all gung-ho about your rights, do something that MATTERS. Go to a rally. Form a lobbying group to effect change. Organise a letter-writing campaign to your local politician. Run for local office.
Or failing that, try refusing to show ID and strolling straight into a nightclub, past the SAS-looking motherfucker on the door.

So keep reading those online forums about how it’s your right to not leave a tip if you don’t like the way the waitress didn’t smile at you, Mr. Training Consultant Fucktard. And the next time a troll starts wrecking the discussion and then points out that he’s not technically breaking any rules, then remember how you behaved exactly the same way to some poor schmuck trying to do his job.

According to the BBC, Astro-nut Lisa Nowak’s attorney intends to enter a plea of “not guilty by reason of insanity.” Did anyone else not see that coming, because on the planet I’m from — Earth — driving several hundred miles in a diaper (so you don’t have to stop to use the bathroom, even though you’ll inevitably have to stop to refuel) in order to kidnap, assault, and/or kill your ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend isn’t exactly normal…

…unless you’re Carrie Underwood, who seems to believe keying trucks, slashing tires, busting out headlights, and carving your name into the seats of your ex’s vehicle is perfectly acceptable behavior if another woman is involved.